Expiration Dates on Canned Food

I hesitate to write about the Coronavirus pandemic. There usually is a gap of two or more weeks between the time I write something and when it gets published in the newspaper. Since this health emergency situation seems to change by the hour, whatever I write now, by the time it’s printed, will seem less current than a story about Charles Lindbergh’s flight.

 

However, there is something I’d like to discuss, which I think will be pertinent for quite a while: the expiration dates on canned food.

If what I saw at Stop & Shop the other day is any indication — completely empty shelves in the canned food aisle — then folks are going to be looking at those expiration dates for the next couple of years. (Let’s at least hope they’ll be looking at those expiration dates years from now. If they have to use those cans of Minestrone soup and Spaghetti-O’s in a few weeks to survive, then so-called clever commentary by me in a newspaper column will be less current than a story about George Washington at Valley Forge.)

The expiration dates on canned food usually say something like, “BEST BY.” (Not to be confused with the place where I recently bought an iPad: Best Buy.)

This simply means the food inside the can will taste best if you eat it by that particular date. It does not mean a can of chicken noodle soup will be fine to eat on, say, JUN 4 2022, but will turn into a fetid pool of deadly botulism on JUN 5 2022. 

 

By the way, when I use terms like “will taste best” and “be fine to eat,” I understand there are many people who would rather starve than eat canned food. I’m not saying, for example, that canned soup tastes as good as Momma’s homemade recipe, or that Spam tastes as good as, well, as good as anything you can dig out of a Dumpster behind a restaurant. I’m referring to canned food as something that will provide basic nourishment, with the understanding that freshly prepared food always tastes better. (Unless I’m doing the cooking. Then you might want to track down a Dumpster.)

Various internet articles claim that canned food will last roughly twice its listed shelf life time, especially if stored in a cool, dark place and the cans are not dented. And as we all know, if it’s on the internet, it must be true!

I’m convinced the expiration dates printed on food cans are designed mostly for two purposes: first, to give retail stores information so they can rotate their stock — that is, sell the older stuff first and put the new stuff on the back of the shelf; and second, to scare consumers into throwing food away if it’s close to the expiration date and buy new stuff, thus increasing sales.

That second reason might be a bit cynical on my part. But on the other hand, I’ve run into a lot of sales and marketing people over the years, and “Do whatever it takes to get the sale!” is not just a slogan, it’s a way of life.

 

So, for all you folks who stocked up on canned food, keep an eye on those expiration dates, but don’t panic if you go a few months past. And for all you folks who did panic and got into fist fights at Walmart while purchasing a two-year supply of toilet paper, you should be ashamed of yourselves!

And by the way, the expiration date on toilet paper is next week. So, you should bring one of those 12-packs over to my house, since I’m running low on old newspapers.