Anti-clockwise Roundabouts and Bloody Twits

I’ve been thinking about roundabouts lately. No, I don’t mean the song “Roundabout” by the popular 1970s British band Yes. I’ve heard that song countless times, but when I looked up the lyrics online recently, I was surprised to realize I had no idea what they were saying in about two-thirds of the song. This is pretty common with a lot of rock songs, as they don’t teach a class titled Enunciation 101 at Rock ‘n Roll University. But they do offer an advanced course called Mumble & Mutter 304.
 
Nor was I thinking about these lyrics: “Behind the shelter in the middle of a roundabout, a pretty nurse is selling poppies from a tray,” which is from a song by another British rock band, whose name escapes me at the moment.

Anyway, in our part of the world, the more common term for roundabout is rotary or circle. These are the highway intersections without traffic lights. Cars enter the circle turning to the right. Turning to the left would be a British move, also known in the States as a fatal move. Once in the circle, you continue in a counter-clockwise direction (or anti-clockwise, if you’re British) until you reach the road on which you wish to continue. At this point you exit the rotary and carry on your merry way.

In theory, it’s simple, safe, and effective. However, I’ve been thinking about roundabouts recently because twice in the past few weeks I’ve approached a rotary and the car in front of me came to a complete stop, even though the circle was free of other cars. In each case, the driver apparently had never encountered a rotary before and was completely baffled by this mysterious circular section of highway. It seemed as if they were waiting for a light to turn green — which would be a long wait, since there are no lights at a rotary. Either that, or the drivers thought the Yield sign meant the same thing as a Stop sign. (To be fair, I usually treat Stop signs as Yield signs.)

In both cases, it was clear to me the drivers were a bit confused and apprehensive. So, I attempted to put them at ease by offering a cheery Connecticut greeting: I blasted my car horn with my right hand and stuck my left arm out the window and waved it frantically, communicating the friendly message, “Move your butt, ya bozo!!” (Or in Britain it would mean, “Move your bum, you bloody twit!!”)

Later I was surprised to discover the State of Connecticut Department of Motor Vehicles website has an entire page, with multiple links, devoted to the history of roundabouts. They fell into disfavor in recent decades, mostly because of negative experiences with the ones built in the first half of the 20th century, especially the notorious “Cape Cod Rotaries.” This is because they were large-diameter circles with multiple lanes, and cars would enter and exit at high speeds. Accidents were common, and some drivers, once entering the rotary, would find it almost impossible to exit. Some would just continue around and around for hours until they ran out of gas, and then wait for a tow truck thankfully to drag them off the rotary.

However, rotaries have become popular again because the design has been drastically improved. I’ll bet you didn’t know there was any designing involved, beyond a DOT draftsman locating his protractor and making a circle on a highway drawing. The new and improved design makes the rotary diameter much smaller. Vehicles are forced to enter and exit at low speeds, which make the circles much less dangerous.

So, in my opinion, roundabouts are my cup of tea — as long as the bloody twit in front of me keeps his bum moving.