In addition to this weekly newspaper column, I write a faith essay each week, which I then record for WJMJ, the Catholic radio station for the Hartford Archdiocese. Every week I also put together a group email with the two essays and send it out to a few hundred relatives, friends, and total strangers. (So, yes, I may be one of the people contributing to the glut of unsolicited messages in your email inbox. Sorry.)
Anyway, I occasionally get email notes that express concern about the juxtaposition of two such disparate themes in the group emails I send out. The first thing I do when I receive notes like this is look up the definition of the words juxtaposition and disparate.
Anyway, I occasionally get email notes that express concern about the juxtaposition of two such disparate themes in the group emails I send out. The first thing I do when I receive notes like this is look up the definition of the words juxtaposition and disparate.
A recent note I received summarized the general sentiment of these messages: “You wrote about your colonoscopy — in detail! — and then 2 seconds later you’re talking about one of Jesus’ most important parables??? That’s sacrilegious!!!”
OK, the first thing to understand is, I don’t write the two essays two seconds apart. I write the humor column for the newspaper when I’m in a goofy mood. And then at some other time when I’m in a more spiritual mood, I write the faith essay. But if you’ve ever read or heard those faith essays, you know that goofiness is always lurking just below the surface. This is because, as it’s been pointed out to me by a loved one, I am living proof that youth is fleeting but immaturity can last forever. Guilty as charged.
The second thing to understand is, three consecutive question marks or three consecutive exclamation points will make your English teacher quite apoplectic. (Yeah, I had to look up the definition of that word, too.) I realize no English teacher will see your email message to me, and as an Engineering major who received a C-minus in Freshman Composition, I am certainly not qualified to add or deduct points. I’m just saying the triple punctuation marks are not necessary!!! Understand???
OK, the first thing to understand is, I don’t write the two essays two seconds apart. I write the humor column for the newspaper when I’m in a goofy mood. And then at some other time when I’m in a more spiritual mood, I write the faith essay. But if you’ve ever read or heard those faith essays, you know that goofiness is always lurking just below the surface. This is because, as it’s been pointed out to me by a loved one, I am living proof that youth is fleeting but immaturity can last forever. Guilty as charged.
The second thing to understand is, three consecutive question marks or three consecutive exclamation points will make your English teacher quite apoplectic. (Yeah, I had to look up the definition of that word, too.) I realize no English teacher will see your email message to me, and as an Engineering major who received a C-minus in Freshman Composition, I am certainly not qualified to add or deduct points. I’m just saying the triple punctuation marks are not necessary!!! Understand???
Now that I think about it, I didn’t even discuss my colonoscopy in detail in that recent essay. I did, however, go into rather graphic detail in a newspaper column about 17 years ago, after the first time I experienced that procedure. This time around, I was much more refined and mature — except maybe for the “Kodak camera duct-taped to the end of a garden hose” comment.
What I try to do with my writing is bring a little levity to faith topics, something, in my opinion, the religious world desperately needs. And I occasionally try to interject a little faith into my humor columns. I think I’m doing a pretty good job of this, based on the vast number of offers I’ve received from publishing companies and religious broadcasters. (Total number of offers to date: exactly one, which occurred about two decades ago when an elderly gentleman read a religious book I had written, and then begged me to relocate to Mississippi and take over as head writer and editor of his fundamentalist Baptist monthly magazine. I think he had a nervous breakdown when I finally broke the news to him that I’m Catholic. And I am not kidding. That really happened.)
What I try to do with my writing is bring a little levity to faith topics, something, in my opinion, the religious world desperately needs. And I occasionally try to interject a little faith into my humor columns. I think I’m doing a pretty good job of this, based on the vast number of offers I’ve received from publishing companies and religious broadcasters. (Total number of offers to date: exactly one, which occurred about two decades ago when an elderly gentleman read a religious book I had written, and then begged me to relocate to Mississippi and take over as head writer and editor of his fundamentalist Baptist monthly magazine. I think he had a nervous breakdown when I finally broke the news to him that I’m Catholic. And I am not kidding. That really happened.)
By the way, if you are a glutton for punishment, er, I mean, if you are unaware of my faith essays and are interested in receiving my weekly email blast, just send me a note at MerryCatholic@gmail.com and I’ll put you on the list. And don’t worry, if you decide it’s not your cup of tea, just request that I remove your email address from my group list, and I will promptly, um, think about it.
There's nothing wrong with 3 question marks or exclamation points. The writer knows what level of feeling they are at and how many they need. I do it all the time.
ReplyDeleteRuth O'Keefe
Juxtaposition and apoplectic aren't hard words. Everybody knows what they mean.
ReplyDeleteRuth O'Keefe
And while we are working on composition here.....there is no such thing as an email note. A note is a message written on paper and delivered in some manner to the recipient. An email is the same thing done electronically. Something is either an email or a note. It can't be both.
ReplyDeleteRuth O'Keefe