Friday, May 11, 2018

Aggressive Drivers in Connecticut


A couple of weeks ago a news report discussed the findings of a nationwide research project, which ranked the 50 U.S. states based on this category: most aggressive drivers. And guess what? Little ol’ Connecticut ranks Number Two in the nation. That’s right, Nutmeg State drivers are more aggressive than motorists in 48 other states. Who says we haven’t achieved anything noteworthy in recent years?

The study, conducted by an outfit called “GasBuddy” (which sounds like a pill you might need to take after having breakfast, lunch, and dinner at Taco Bell), defines aggressive driving this way: speeding, rapid acceleration, hard braking, and abrupt lane changing. Well, in Connecticut, we call this behavior…driving.

The state rankings were based on that well-known scientific unit of measure: “Number of minutes between aggressive driving events.” Unfortunately, there were no details in the news story that explained how the folks at GasBuddy gathered their data. But based on recent congressional testimony by Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg regarding privacy concerns, I suspect tech companies have embedded secret software into all of our cell phones that monitors every move we make 24 hours per day — including our driving habits and whether last night’s dinner requires a couple extra GasBuddy pills.

Connecticut drivers averaged 8.2 minutes between aggressive driving events. This is slightly more frequent than the next most aggressive states, Georgia, Texas, North Carolina, and New Jersey. The number one aggressive driving state, by a wide margin, is California, with an average of only 6.6 minutes between aggressive driving events.

The report noted that “states with densely populated cities and high levels of congestion are where motorists are more inclined to drive aggressively.” From what I’ve heard, Southern California has the most horribly congested highways on Planet Earth, so it makes sense they’d be ranked Number One. But I’m not surprised Connecticut ranks right up there near the top.

Recently, I got into an argument with a couple of guys about congested highways. We all agreed LA and DC were in a special category of awfulness, so we focused on the northeast. One guy insisted Boston was the worst, and the other guy said the worst traffic problems, by far, are in New York.

I stood my ground, and displaying an inordinate amount of Constitution State pride, I insisted the worst roads are in Connecticut. “95 in Norwalk! 84 in Waterbury!” I shouted. “They’re terrible!”

When retorts of “Mass Pike to Logan!” and “FDR Drive!” were launched at me, I countered with a challenge, “OK, you drive from Middlebury to Southington at 8 a.m. Then make the return trip at 4:30 p.m. Then you get back to me with your results — but you won’t be able to get back to me, because you’ll still be stuck in traffic!!”

Finally, one of the guys said smugly, “Why would I ever want to go to those dopey towns in your dopey state?” And that’s when I hit him with the crowbar, your honor. Case dismissed!

Anyway, the GasBuddy organization is focused on helping motorist reduce aggressive driving, because all that rapid acceleration and hard braking can cause a driver to spend well over $400 per year in extra fuel consumption.

So, the truth of the matter is, Connecticut drivers are not aggressive; we’re just being good citizens. The governor is always whining that gas tax revenues are down because cars have much better fuel economy these days. Nutmeg State drivers are just trying to keep the government afloat with all our fast starts and stops, which force us to purchase more gasoline and pay more taxes.

To be honest, this whole situation is giving me heartburn. I need to take a couple of GasBuddy pills.


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