How Old Are You … In Your Head?

Here’s an interesting question: How old do you think you are in your head?

Please note, I’m not asking how old you actually are. Most of us already know that about ourselves. And if we’re not sure, we can look at our driver’s license and do the math. In my case, I subtract 1957 from 2023 and determine that I’m 166 years old. (Oh wait, that’s wrong. I’m not good at doing math in my head. The correct answer is 66, which, to a 25-year-old, is pretty much the same thing as 166.)

My original question is not the same as: How old do you feel? How we feel changes on an hourly basis. When I first wake up in the morning, I feel like I’m 75, especially with my creaky knees and back. But a while later, when I’m at the YMCA and swimming laps, about 10 minutes into my session I feel like I’m 40. Then, after finishing my 30-minute workout, when my legs and arms are tired and a little rubbery, as I try to climb out of the pool I feel like I’m 90.

By the way, over two months ago my New Year’s resolution was to join the Y and swim laps three times each week. Since this is the first time in forever that I’ve had a New Year’s resolution successfully continue past mid-January, I hesitate to even mention this little effort to get in better shape. I’m afraid I might jinx myself and by the time this essay appears in the newspaper I’ll have resumed my old morning exercise routine of weightlifting, specifically lifting a jumbo coffee with my left hand and a glazed cruller (or two) with my right hand. Anyway, getting back to the original question: How old do you think you are in your head? Medical professionals call this “subjective age,” and studies have discovered that most people over the age of 40 instinctively think they are about 20 percent younger than their actual age. 

In my case, that would be the low 50s, and that’s exactly how old I think I am. For example, when I look at the list of celebrity birthdays each day in the paper, if someone just turned 50, I think, “Oh, we’re the same generation.” Then I pause and realize the person is almost a full generation younger than me. And when I see that someone is in his or her mid-60s, I instinctively think, “Whoa, they’re old.” A moment later, it dawns on me that we’re the same age.

A similar thing happens if you attend a class reunion. You look around the room at all your former classmates and wonder how they all got so wrinkled and gray and stocky. Later on, when you look at some photos of the event, you’re genuinely surprised that you look exactly like everyone else.

I suspect a reason why I think in my head that I’m only in my early 50s is because it seems like it was about six months ago that I actually WAS in my early 50s. Time is flying by at breakneck speed nowadays. The past decade and a half have gone by in the blink of an eye.

I’m not sure how other people perceive the passing of time, but for me it’s accelerating like a freight train barreling down a mountain track with no brakes. The inevitable crash will be something.

The way things are going, I’ll probably wake up next Tuesday and discover I just turned 80. At that moment, in my head I’ll be convinced I’m only 60. It should be fine, as long as someone gives me a hand getting out of the pool.